Guest post by By Lee and Paul Reyes-Fournier of CoupleDumb.com.
Most people can agree on one thing, they want to be happy. However, in our society we receive so many messages and examples of being unhappy that the path to Nirvana is often blocked by ignorance and cynics. But just like a unicorn, the hope of happiness makes us seek it out for just a glimpse of bliss. Some people have figured out that happiness is attainable and not contingent on anything but you!
Here are 7 things you need to believe to stay happy:
1. Since time has been recorded, man has endured mayhem, mishap, pestilence, pain, oppression, repression, uncertainty and unease.
Today is no better or worse than before. But there is one difference. You are here!
2. We understand that
we choose how we feel. A person can get angry with the rain but they will still get wet. A person can fear the future and yet tomorrow comes.
A person can choose to be happy in spite of everything.
3. Happy people are role models. We do not pull people up to our point of view. We show them the stairs. We do not spoon feed but we are willing to share a meal with them. Most importantly,
we are beholden to our progeny to set the example of happiness.
4. You are part of society. Your choice to be happy despite your surroundings is not a call for communal living but for living in community.
Happiness is a responsibility to see through the misery to find the hope.
5.
Perfection is relative. Happiness is absolute. Happiness is not dramatically opposed to sadness, nor does it supplant any other emotion. Happiness is a companion and like every good friend, it gives us what we need as we need it. When it walks with grief, it gives us hope.
6. Happiness is an emotion. Happiness is intrinsic. Happiness feels like the awe of satisfaction. Satisfaction is not dependent on accomplishments.
Happiness is the state of honoring the moment. And the next…And the next…
7.
Happiness is not a compromise. Being content is a false bill of goods we were sold to keep us miserable. In a world of ‘I can’t get no…’ we are told to settle for what we have. Happiness is beyond this. It is not dependent on what we have but who we choose to be.
The most important thing to maintain your happiness is to
surround yourself with like minded individuals. We need to create and maintain an atmosphere of happiness or we can be dragged down to the morass of melancholia. So, dump the victim friends and drama filled relationships. Your happiness depends on it.
By Lee and Paul Reyes-Fournier
Lee and Paul Reyes-Fournier are the writers of
CoupleDumb.com the relationship blog that covers everything from marriage to dating to parenting. They have a book called Dysaffirmation: Because this kind of stupid takes work (Amazon). Lee is a professional psychotherapist with over 20 years of experience in marriage, family and addiction therapies. Paul is a professional writer with degrees in AstroPhysics and an MBA. They have been married for 23 happy years and have three kids. Lee and Paul also do a web series and pod cast called
Relationship Rehab where they take viewer/listener questions.
